Hi. It’s me. I’m the big hairless cat you live with, the one who walks on his hind legs, the one who uses that watery thing for a litter box. The one you sleep next to, who makes all those snoring noises. Yes, I know it was crazy to cut off all my whiskers. Sorry if I scared you. Big hairless cats do weird things.

I’m looking at you as I write this. You’re lying in my bed, sleeping, because you’ve been feeling tired and run-down all day. You don’ t know it yet, but probably in the next few days you’re going to go through a change. It will be a very sad day for me, because I will have lost my precious boy, but it will be a good day for you. You will give up the virus-ravaged body you’re in now, and if I understand anything about souls, you’re going to be free, in a body of pure light, looking on the world through all-seeing eyes and finally understanding everything. That’s how you’re reading this letter.

Now that you can finally understand me, I want to say some things that I don’t think I was ever able to get across to you before. First and foremost among them, I want you to know that I have loved you so very much, every day since the day we first met. I can tell that you’ve loved me too. Like all friends, we’ve been through some tough times, but I never for one second stopped thinking of you as my best pal. I’m sorry I got angry at you for the times when you used the center of my bed for a litter box. If I’d cleaned the real one often enough, you wouldn’t have had to send me that message. It worked, you know. I hope you noticed that I’ve cleaned out your box every night, without fail, since you came back to me.

Here’s another thing. I was away from you for a long time recently. I know it wasn’t a good time for you, and I know you think I left you. I didn’t. Me and the other big cat who used to live with us were having problems, and I had to leave so we wouldn’t keep hissing at each other. I couldn’t bring you with me then. It’s hard to explain. I was living in places where they don’t respect cats or recognize their divine right to property ownership. The whole time, I missed you terribly, you were just about all I talked about to the other big cats. I wanted to give you a great home, a place where you could live the carefree life that cats cherish. I’m sorry the move was so traumatic for you. Thanks for letting me stay here too.

That big scary bird who shrieks at you is named Sammy. I know you’ve never liked him much, because he tries to make you jump out of your skin with those noises. What you need to know is that he’s just jealous. He sees how much time you spend lying on my lap, and he wishes I were spending that time with him. He knows that if he makes that one noise, the one you really, really hate, you’ll jump up and run away. I’ve tried to get him out of that habit but it’s no good, he’s a bird. You’ve eaten a few, you know how tragically stupid they can be sometimes. He’s got a good heart, though. I hope you forgive him.

I also want to say something about those times when I had to hold you really tight, and squirt really bad tasting things into your mouth. I know you didn’t understand, and you thought I was angry with you, or that I was trying to hurt you. The stuff I was squirting was medicine … it was meant to help you feel better and get over your sick times. I’m having to do the same thing to you every day now, and the medicine I’m giving you is supposed to make you feel more comfortable. You’re a big, proud boy even in your weakened state, and I know you have to fight me when I try to give you your medicine. I have to try to give it to you, and I hope you understand that it’s because I love you and want you not to feel so sick.

I want you to know that every minute you’ve spent with me, lying on my lap, lying at my feet in bed, shouting at me when you were hungry, nibbling or clawing me when you wanted attention, even looking at me from the window as I got in my car in the morning, every little second of that made me feel so, so loved. You, my beautiful gentle tiger, were the most loving, affectionate, sweet, caring cat the world has ever known. You have a beautiful heart and the spirit of an angel, and now that you are free, I hope you go bounding through the gates of heaven feeling like a kitten again. You’ll find dB there, the loudmouthed siamese cat who was your friend for so many years. Your little friend Bandit’s there too, the fuzzy gray cat with the jowls, and you can bet he wants to play.

I know you saw me lying around making low meowing noises, leaking from the eyes, and staring at you, stroking your fur. I know it worried you. It’s just that I know things are changing, and big hairless cats aren’t good at dealing with changes. I’m a lot worse at it than most. I hate seeing you so tired and listless, I hate knowing you’re leaving me, and I just get selfish and want you to stay. I know the day will come when you let me know that you’re hurting, that it’s too hard for you to go on, and I will have to help you to your final rest, free you from the suffering, and I don’t want that day to come. That’s why I make the noises, that’s why I look at you so lovingly and so sadly. It’s just that I love you so.

Thank you for all the wonderful years you’ve given me. Thank you for the love, the companionship, the friendship. I will never, ever forget you.