SOCKS, along with most firewall-related software, has several aspects that make it somewhat unsuitable for children.

When it makes connection requests, it uses a specialized protocol that may not be understandable by children or, for that matter, many adults and most members of the animal kingdom.

During the setup phase of proxy circuits, only authorized clients and servers can participate. There is no separate facility for connecting to children; this is probably a good thing as they would only complicate matters.

During the relay of application data through the circuit, child processes are supported. It is rumoured that a future release will, however, require them to wear stockings.

Oh, it’s stockings-type-socks that you meant in the first place? In that case, never, NEVER allow a child to come in to possession of a sock that’s had a bar of soap dropped into the toe. It is a formidable weapon.

For additional sock-related gossip, check here.